“Most people are other people. Their thoughts are someone else's opinions, their lives a mimicry, their passions a quotation”, so said the famous Oscar Wilde.

We talk about individualism, as our birth right; we believe we are all individuals, living a free life, guarded by nothing but our free will. But is that not an illusion, when we are all trying to be someone that is acceptable by the society at large.

Take this for example… A manager who wants to hire a new employee, would say, I want someone who can think for himself, take his own decisions, is capable of looking at the larger picture….. guess you get the gist. When the actual hiring process is on, people will get rejected (things not written on paper), because of the way they speak, they look, or some action which makes the manager uncomfortable.

The same principle holds true for our personal life. How many times do we look at a stranger and say.. “Oh my God, what on earth is he wearing, does he have no fashion sense at all”. Fashion, created by few, and is mostly in the mind, has everyone dressing up the same. Aren’t we all guilty of “the 1st impression” syndrome?


I’m not saying the manager is at fault, having the 1st impression is wrong, but my point is we are all comfortable with the people who are more like us. We have our comfort zone, and we are more at ease with people who are more like us.

So the real question now, since we are all different by the very essence of our being, and at the same time we have this great, unwritten, undefined need to be accepted…. We change… or do we really just pretend to be someone we’re not.

We know which is the right book to read, so we read the book, the person whose quotes are acceptable to all, so we make sure we know the right quotes… though we might not know when to use them appropriately..

“If I'm going to sing like someone else, then I don't need to sing at all.” As quoted by a singer, I don’t know who.

Isn’t that the reason, why there is so much dissatisfaction? The yesteryears are missed by all.

In my opinion, it’s not that TV, or internet or malls that are in themselves a problem, it’s that we need to be updated with the latest movies, and soaps, and what’s happening all the time. If we all try to be the same, are we any better than the sheep…… who move in a herd.

Change is important, change is essential, but we change.. not because we want to, but we think we have to. Worse yet, we pretend to have changed.